Wednesday, October 19, 2011

My Struggle Right Now

Right now, I don't have a nagging sweet tooth.  I don't have the desire to binge eat a raft of food.  I am quite content with my smaller portions diet.  But, I am dealing with a certain dieting demon.  IMPATIENCE!!!  There, I said it.  I want this blog to be a totally accurate and honest account of my feelings and experiences through this weight loss journey.  So, in all honesty, I am struggling with severe impatience.  Impatience over the speed ( or more accurately the lack of speed) of weight loss.  Basically the thought pattern goes something like this: I have been dieting for over a month...I have been making do with smaller portions and exercising...so I expect something in return...I want to SEE some progress.  I want to FEEL some progress.  I want to HEAR from people, "wow you have really been losing some weight!"  I have lost 16 pounds, but I haven't had any of that.  I know I have not felt or seen anything!!  How depressing.  How utterly boring.  I feel like Linus who is waiting and waiting for the Great Pumpkin to arrive.  It never comes.  My tummy is still there.  Just as big as ever.   I went hiking today.  I didn't glide along the paths-it was the usual struggle.
So I think writing it down will help.  I believe that recognizing this potential pitfall and addressing it is the first step in fixing it.  I know that I must keep telling myself that the weight wasn't put on in a day so it won't come off in a day, or week, or month.  I certainly do believe that losing it slowly will enable me to keep the weight off long term.  I know it was important for me to address this because, I don't want to just let the dieting demon win by talking me into a mental tailspin.  To me this journey is every bit as much of a mental battle as it is a physical struggle.  I have worked too hard to just quit because the progress is excruciatingly slow!

21 comments:

  1. Yes, it IS as much a mental battle as a physical one. It takes time and there is no magic. So, yes, impatience can be a result. You will get there.

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  2. Wow, you've lost 16 pounds already?

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  3. @AngryPorkchop Well I don't know about "already" hehe...Yeah, I started on 9/11/11 at 311 and as of yesterday I was at 295. I have to say the accountability of "having to" post weekly updates on Youtube is a strong motivation!!! Thanks for reading!!! My latest weigh in frustration can be seen at www.youtube.com/watch?v=nEsdK8L3X_c

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  4. Oh man I think we've all been there before. I had to lose 30 pounds before anyone noticed and then it wasn't until I lost another 20 that someone else asked if i was losing weight... are u kidding? Umm ONLY 50 pounds... I know it feels excruciatingly slow but when you look at the bigger picture (i.e. we are already halfway through october and 2012 is around the corner) time is FLYING by... definitely keep at it. In no time you'll look back on this post and be glad you stuck with it... :0)

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  5. Perhaps a visual of 16 pounds would help you see your accomplishment. Next time you go to the store pick up 3 five pound bags of potatoes and walk around with them, that's what you have lost , forever gone, never to come back.

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  6. I certainly understand this. Think about your goals - not just the numbers, but what you really want from weight loss. No matter how much time it takes, the results, the feeling of achievement, the health benefits ... they're worth it.

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  7. @ 16 pounds down already you are doing awesome, keep it up and its ok to get frustrated :)

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  8. I remember when Sandy and I first started walking (and then eventually running), we had been at it for like 2 months and I felt no different. So I gave up looking at it and worrying about and sure enough it just started melting away and people would notice and comment. 16 pounds is awesome! You are doing great! Keep it up!

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  9. I understand - esp. since I've fought w/ mostly the same weight for over 2 years now! Sometimes I feel like a fraud - like I haven't been honest on my blog, but I have. This is where measuring your body really helps - I have lost over 15" in the past 2 years! I AM smaller - but people still comment on my smaller size and say "you have lost a lot of weight" and I don't know what to say, b/c the scale hasn't moved a whole lot but I am smaller! Don't just measure w/ the scale - measure with your changed behaviour and attitudes as well as the scale.
    You WILL do it!
    Dawn

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  10. @Carbie Girl You got it exactly right!!! LOL You know what it's like!!! Thanks for taking the time to comment. It's nice to know that I'm not the only one.

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  11. @Fatoutofskinny You are right. A physical comparison is a great reminder...and hopefully never to come back...it's too hard to get it off to allow it to come back on!!

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  12. It most certainly is a mental battle, and recognizing that is a great step! It takes time, and it will be hard.. but NOT doing it is also hard. I guess what I'm saying is that it's going to be hard either way, but that one of the two options takes you where you want to go!

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  13. @Ken Hello, great to see you here!

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  14. ❀❀ Dawn (Lay Down My Idols) ❀❀ I am glad that you are being honest on your blog. What good does it do to lie to ourselves? That is why I wanted to get it out here so I can refer back to it or help someone else going through it.

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  15. @oh_mg Yes the goals will be worth the time. I just like to vent. You know the whole misery loves company thing!

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  16. Paul,

    First thank you for popping by my blog and commenting.

    Now, I appreciate your need to get that out! Show me a person who does not (secretly or otherwise) want to wake to a thin and beautiful us and I will show you a lie-ya!

    Given time people will notice. If you are really heavy, it may be a while. I have lost like maybe 60 odd pounds and was just saying to myself today that this hill I hike is still kicking my arse. I used to tell my husband that once I dropped the 50 pound potato sack I was going to race past him on the hill. Of course that has not happened... and it was more like a hundred and a quarter pound sack, but that is when I preferred to not acknowledge the exact nature of my obesity!

    Concentrate on the looseness of your pants in the waist or how well you are doing with exercise or food because there is NO OTHER alternative right? You regain, you die early. Humbug to end on, but!

    Dieting is a bitch.

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  17. I'm most always behind what Munchberry adds, 100% - and this time is no different. Changing focus will indeed help. Yes, slow and steady wins the race and no, the weight did not come on overnight so why should it come off overnight, yada-yada-yada; I'm sure there were times when you didn't notice the changes that were taking place when your body was gaining, right? My point is that even though you may not be seeing the kind of progress you are looking for right now, your remarkable body is in the process RIGHT NOW of repairing itself - becoming stronger, thinner, leaner. You'll wake up one day and you will be amazed. I guarantee it, Paul. Keep up the great work!

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  19. I've lost 18 pounds in 4 weeks. I can understand the need to want to get all the weight off NOW. But.....I'm sorry to say this, but I want to be honest, Eating right, watching portions and exercising is now a LIFE LONG THING for us now! we've already proven we can't be trusted...lol So think about it as a Life Style Change and not a diet...it may help you see things a little differently. I hope this helps!

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